What's Skurka up to?

Corpus Christi-

Special La Bandera Exclusive Interview:  Mark Skurka (D) dishes on what he's been busy with since his June departure from the Nueces County District Attorney's office.

He's got "Hungry Eyes"
-Skurka sets his sights
on D.A. position. 

"Oh, you know.  Same ol', same ol'" says Skurka in a special interview with La Bandera.  "I have alot of things on my plate, ya know.  It's a heaping helping, that's for sure!" says Skurka during an early breakfast meeting at the Golden Corral restaurant in beautiful Corpus Christi, Texas.  Skurka is currently in the "thick gravy" that is election time.  "I've been as busy as a Butterball, I tell ya.  All this campaigning takes its Toll House, if ya catch my drift." says Skurka, tearing into a pile of hashbrown casserole.

A slice of Skurka's daily routine.

In what was supposed to be a brief meeting at the breakfast buffet, the interview quickly turned into a 4 hour presentation of Skurka's plans for the office, often peppered with a few "power-naps" for the D.A. hopeful.  "I hereby call this luncheon adjourned!" says Skurka, after La Bandera footed the bill for the lunch portion of the meeting at the same restaurant.  "I didn't know they were gonna charge ya twice, boy!" Skurka smirked.  

Skurka has been a piece of the pie in the District Attorneys office for over 10 years, with a notable record of convictions, but even more interesting, are his confections.  Since his early 20's, the jolly former prosecutor has wowed co-workers with his grasp of the culinary.  "I've been making treats for office functions at my desk for years.  I have an Easy-Bake oven in my top drawer, and a George Foreman Grill instead of a computer.  Sometimes I drag out the computer AND the grill.  Turn it into a sort of Panini press." says Skurka in a second interview around 3 p.m. the same day at a local Sonic Drive-In.  

"Can I get a witness?" -Skurka speaking to local students.

Mark Skurka has also been busy traveling all over Nueces County working free-lance as a motivational speaker.  The political candidate offers to give La Bandera a special tour of Nueces County in his van that keeps down by the Nueces River, where he often sleeps, as well.  "I'm going to bear-claw my way to the top again, even if I have to steam-jelly-roll the people who get in my way." says Skurka of his political dreams.  "You a fan of tamales, boy?  Exit Ayers, son."

The jovial candidate has been met with some unsavory opposition.  Skurka has been often criticized in the local media for being too complacent with his position; which in turn created a massive backlog of cases, clogging up the County's arteries of effectiveness at prosecuting criminals.  "Oh, backlog, cheeselog!  I have not been complacent!  If anything, I'd say I was soley responsible for chicken-greasing the wheels of that office." 

"Objection!"-Skurka in action at new job.  

"Look, I'm a people person.  I need back in that office." sighs Skurka, who has been unemployed for months. "I mean, I'm not totally jobless.  I have a weekend gig." says Skurka, referring to his part-time employment for  McDonald's Corp. as a paid actor for promotional events.